For Immediate Release

Press Release

Rosetta Bunks Off

churi

 The European Space Agency has announced that Director of the Rosetta Project has resigned.

This follows the discovery that the Rosetta spacecraft which was launched more than ten years ago from French Guiana and programmed to chase down Comet 67/PChuryumov-Gerasimenko (known affectionately as Churo) and drop a lander equipped with scientific instruments onto its surface, has gone rogue.

Despite the reassuring signals received over the last decade suggesting it was on course, it has now been established that it is hiding in some bushes off an autostrade in northern Italy.

ENDS

Note for Editors: More info here.

This for Friday Fictioneers’ 100 word challenge.

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30 Responses to For Immediate Release

  1. Nan Falkner says:

    Dear Patrick, Great story and you have such a great imagination! I really liked this – I have seen some news stories about this lately – pretty awesome! Nan 🙂

    • It is amazing the things these science boffins can do. And mind-blowing technology.
      (Actually, Rosetta isn’t in Italy – that was just a story for FF and to mislead journalists – she’s safely hidden on a small island in the East Anglian fens.)

  2. Sarah Ann says:

    So Rosetta preferred Italy to going off-planet – who can blame her? – but I’m thinking there should have been more resignations, or at least some attempt at an explanation/ excuse from him/ her as to why the signals have been misinterpreted. 😉 Really enjoyed reading.

    • Italy’s nice and warm. Churo’s freezing cold and barren. No contest!
      Whenever did the bureaucrats ever have to apologise or explain? The system would collapse.

  3. Blake says:

    I do like the idea of the spacecraft hiding in the bushes like a naughty child 🙂

  4. Patrick, Hilarious. I laughed out loud. 😀 I could just see the poor thing hiding in the bushes. Some of us are just not meant for great adventures. What a scandal. Is someone going to go there and bring poor Churo home. I can see it following a child and the child saying “It followed me home. Can I keep it?” 😀 Well written. 🙂 —Susan

  5. storydivamg says:

    Fun bit of humour there, Patrick. Unique POV and take on this particular prompt.

    All my best,
    Marie Gail

  6. Hahaha a rogue spacecraft! Awesome! This story had me rolling 🙂

  7. mscwhite says:

    A very entertaining piece!

  8. Dear Patrick,

    Something fishy afloat and in the air. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  9. I wonder who is transmitting that signal? Is this the final evidence that ESA peeps were in cahoots with aliens all along?

  10. Sandra says:

    Very topical. Well done.

  11. This is clever and funny, Patrick, and extremely topical. I laughed loud at your ending.

  12. Theatre of the Absurd is a genre I enjoy. Anyone who attempts it deserves the applaud. I like the bite in this.

  13. Elizabeth says:

    I would not like Rosetta close to my house, or worse into my house!

  14. I love the humor in this.. wasn’t Rosetta on the news just recently.. and you are saying it’s just a hoax.. probably some corrupted company.. mob-owned most likely…

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